How Dame Sally Coates, Abby Bayford and Brene Brown made me check myself. – A blog post about confessions, values and authenticity.

So I have a confession, I haven’t always been honest.

Covid and Lockdown has given us a lot of time to think. Not as much as some in the media would have people believe and the number of times I have screamed ‘Schools haven’t closed’ at a screen probably says more about the state of my mind than the statement I’m trying to make. But anyway I digress. Upon reflection I haven’t always been honest.

This was my first year as a Vice Principal and although I know I tried, I tried damn hard, I’m not proud of how much of myself I have hidden. I should highlight this is not how my Head feels about me, or anyone else for that matter and this is not imposter syndrome or lack of satisfaction where no matter what I do I will not be happy with it. This is hard reflection. Looking back on the past year I can see I have tried to squeeze, bend, mix, contort into what fits in with the school I have joined. I have told myself on many occasions that this is what is necessary, the first year is about building trust, rapport, getting to know the landscape of your new school, assimilating, but to be honest I’ve never felt 100% convinced.

My problem, I have come to realise is I am waiting for a leader to give me permission to be myself, to be my champion to be my voice to be my cheerleader. But here’s the thing, when you get to VP you are the leader, the champion and the voice, often of the people who need you. I am at my very place because I am different to the Head, yet I have tried to assimilate and that was a foolish thing to do.

Looking back I can see it clearly now, agreeing to decisions I knew would not work in teacher training, an area I am responsible for, but that were insisted upon. Not questioning enough. Going along with paperwork which makes no sense. Going with the motions.

Let me tell you what really brought my behaviour over the last year into focus. Dame Sally Coates. I both loved her and wanted to scream at her whilst reading her book Head Strong – 11 lessons of school Leadership. Someone on twitter recommended it to me and I can’t for the life of me remember who but whoever you are, know that I am wishing so much good for you for bringing this book into my life. In it, Sally (how do you address someone with a Damehood? Do you think she likes being addressed as Dame all the time?) talks about Leading from the front. You may not agree with all of her opinions or practices (Saturday detentions for one) but you cannot doubt her conviction and that she lives according to her values and it was enough to make me reflect on my own. I have the privilege of being mentored by Abby Bayford and her and I have spoken about the role of Values a lot since April. Now in the new academic year with the kids coming back it’s time to really bring mine to the fore. (I’ve also read a lot of Brene Brown over lockdown so I think the mixture of the powerful three Sally, Abby and Brene has now got me going into full confession mode in this blog, don’t blame me blame them!).

During Lockdown and this summer I have spent time really thinking about my values and those I want to demonstrate every day at work and at home. I know people who talk about having a work persona and home persona. I understand that to some extent but it doesn’t sit right with me. I take my whole self to work every day so my values are my values full stop.

So after a lot of self reflection on actions that have made me happy and others that haven’t and working out what is important to me these are the values that I most align with.

Courage – I think it takes courage to be authentic and we are required to be continuously courageous to speak up when something doesn’t sit right with us. I think also as a leader, which everyone is in education, you need courage to reflect and recalibrate and course correct. Courage is what I believe gets us to be hopeful for the future, the courage to dream for our young people is what makes us insist on ensuring they behave the way we know they can and see in them what they themselves cannot yet see, to hold them to a higher standard. It takes courage to be vulnerable so you can experience…

Growth – I’ve heard people talk about reinventing themselves to live a fulfilled life. For me its about growing and revealing more of myself as a leader. Peeling back the armour I have put up, to be more of my authentic self. Which then gives me the space to learn and grow.

Joy – I am eternally optimistic, it’s just in my DNA. I don’t know how not to find a way out of a bad situation and dream. Maybe it’s because my parents were entrepreneurs and immigrants to the UK and hope has kept them eternally moving forward. It was all they had when they faced racism, poverty and despair. I, in my core, like them, believe that my tomorrows will always be better than my todays, that life is abundant in its giving. The alternative to me is too destructive to imagine. I’ve met people who believe in a zero sum game, who believe if someone or some school is getting ahead that this means they are getting behind and I have never seen them prosper. We cannot teach our kids about contributing to future society if we are working from a place from lack. If you are one of those people please stay out of my circle.

So what does living your values mean in the workplace? Well I’m just starting on this journey but the above values have shaped our INSET days and our Teaching and learning and QA processes for the forthcoming year.

Professional Development – I have absolutely refused to introduce anything new this year but worked on taking away and pairing back. Keep the main thing the main thing seems to be my motto right now. I’ve asked teachers to reflect, tweak and really hone in on questioning, modelling and recall. Things they already do. I’ve asked them to come on this courageous journey with me, record themselves, reflect with peers on how they can improve. To become fascinated and obsessed with themselves and their teaching. I’ve also made a promise that I’ll go first and share recordings of myself teaching for open feedback. I’ve asked for courage in the small things. Our professional development programme which requires triads of teachers to work together asks them to be responsible for not only their own growth but that of each others.

Last year we spent a lot of time working on our curriculum plans. To me Joy and curriculum plans go hand in hand. Call me a geek but the joy a well thought through curriculum in History or any other subject brings me is ridiculous. I love hearing about a curriculum journey, how leanring in year 7 is prepping them for bigger questions and reflections in year 9. It is music to me. This year I have asked teachers to overtly share this joy with the kids. We started on this journey last year but our job is not done. I want kids not only to be excited about what they are learning now but what they are going to learn.

I have done away with judgmental QA processes and learning walks. Not one learning walk last year taught me something I didn’t already know. I’ve done away with a PP strategy and combined it into our T&L strategy. There is not one T&L strategy that we are focused on that would not also benefit our PP kids.

These are just some examples of how living from my values has let me to make decisions that I always believed in. I’m excited. I’m nervous, but I’m excited. To some these may seem like small steps but often our actions don’t have to be revolutionary, sometimes its having the passion to not go with the flow that makes them extraordinary.

I’ll be keeping you posted to on how things go.

I would love to build an accountability group. A group of us who come together and hold each other to our values. I honestly believe that sometimes this is harder as a VP then a Head. Because you don’t have the final word and may think the right thing to do is fall in line with the Head’s decisions. This is great if you are completely aligned but I would argue that you are there to be a contrast to your Head to complement them and to help bounce ideas to steer the school forward. Please let me know on @noonetoldmehow if you’d like to join a by monthly zoom conversation.

Recovering from an unsuccessful interview

This blog post is in collaboration with some wonderful people including @EmmaHal39281100, @MrsLFlower and @Miss_Southon

I’ve been putting writing this blog off to be honest. Who likes to talk about their failures in public spaces after all? But it is important what we do. You’ll see a lot of websites talking about what to do in preparation for an interview but not a lot once it is over and you haven’t got the job and that is just as important.

What you won’t find is trite remarks such as ‘It makes you stronger’ or ‘something better will come along’ or ‘If it was meant for you you will have got it,’ even if they may all be true. Hopefully what you will find is some strategies for moving forward. And some ideas on how to grow from the experience.

My experience

I recently went for a Headship interview. I have only been a VP for a year and recognise that it is probably quite early to take the next step. My motivations included ensuring that I understood the process, used it as an opportunity to reflect how far I’d come in the previous year and used it as the best CPD and 360 review I could get my hands on as well as, if possible, get the job. As far as I was concerned I had nothing to lose from giving it a shot.

The rejection

Despite all of the benefits I know I have got out of the experience nothing really makes it any easier to deal with the negative outcome. I knew I was the underdog, I knew there were sections of experience I didn’t have. I did fall in love with the school when I went to visit, which made managing expectations harder. So I gave myself 24 hours to eat and drink my feelings and sulk!

So now that I have been told I haven’t got it what do I do?

Get feedback – Well the first thing I have asked for is the paperwork in relation to my interview questions. The school in question are being wonderful in that they are happy to provide me with question by question feedback so I’m going to make the most of that. Two areas of development were clear. The first, timetabling and the second finance (although I have handled extremely large budgets in the commercial sector for 7 years not managing them in education is a problem).

Make a List – of the structure of the day, tasks, questions, things you struggled with elements you found easy, so that you can remember for next time. You may think you’ll never forget but you will so get it down.

Have a frank conversation with your boss – The interview has given me a place from which to demand development – I knew timetabling and finance were areas for development for me 7 months ago, I had bought them up with my Head who hadn’t done much to develop me in these areas. Since the interview we have a had a very frank conversation about the need for exposure to these elements or the need for me to go elsewhere to get them. A tough but honest conversation which has been provided clarity for both of us.

Take control of your development – Deep down I’ve known I’m repeating what I have previously done and not demanded that the Head give me opportunities to develop in other areas. He is risk averse and therefore would need some convincing. This experience has given me the impetus to do just that. I’m looking for courses, demanding a seat at the table in meetings I would not usually be at in a bid to learn and all of this is happening in context for my Head to understand why so he can support me.

Below is the experience of @EmmaHal39281100

The feeling of rejection is never pleasant, particularly if you’ve had to battle your inner imposter syndrome feelings to start with. I have two experiences that I feel are worth sharing.

A few years ago, I was feeling really overwhelmed with my role, the leadership, at the time did not suit me, and, it is a very challenging school to work in.

1. I was applying for a head of KS3 role in a beautiful school further away from my home town. When I say beautiful, it really was a dream. The tour, lead by the students, was awesome. The whole day went well, weighing up the other candidates I felt strong. There was a niggling feeling that it wasn’t right for me. I continued through to the interview but all the way home I was panicking that I might actually be successful! I opted to pull out. The head teacher was a true gentlemen. I explained that I liked teaching in challenging schools that were, dare I say it…a bit gritty. He completely understood and then, did the most amazing thing…he thanked me for working in challenging contexts and appreciated that the pressures would be different in his school. His out pouring of respect for schools like mine and teachers like me was the boost I needed to realise why I teach where I do.

2. This time i was applying for a second in department role. The current HOD knew of me and my school as we are in similiar areas. Again, the day seemed ok. There was much deliberation and the three candidates, myself included, were wondering why it was taking so long. I was the first to be pulled out. The HOD explained that they were sending me home. She mentioned that work that I was doing at my current school is great and I was making a real difference. Although I felt rejected, hurt, and a little embarrassed…now, with hindsight, I’m delighted! I was making a difference and chipping away at making improvements, our results would improve in time and I should not be applying out demoting myself.

Growing where you are – Since then my department have gone from strength to strength, our school is on an amazing journey and I am considered a driving force behind that. To top it off, myself and my second in department planned, coordinated and hosted a Teachmeet at our school for over 100 teachers! So really, my message is that there’s a lot to learn from rejection. Although it feels raw, your inner demons are shouting “i told you so!” and it can be embarrassing when you tell people you didn’t get it but often, you learn things about yourself, what drives you and where your passions truly lie. Ask yourself, how can I grow where I am?

Learning what is a good fit – Visiting other schools made me realise that you are interviewing the school as much as they are interviewing you. YOu have to ask yourself whether this is the school you want to work for. Similarly, the chances are you are being appointed as part of a team so when being interviewed the interviewer is thinking what you bring to the team. It may be that they already have someone with a similar perspective to you so the rejection isn’t personal it may be to ensure the team is made up of a diverse group of people.

Below is the experience of @Miss_Southon applying for an NQT position

My first interview experience was very daunting after having sent off around six applications all which had been rejected. I felt over the moon when I was finally invited to an interview via zoom for a position in key stage two. Due it being my first interview I was extremely nervous and I didn’t have any idea what to expect from an online interview, it felt very strange having to look at yourself while talking to four other members of the school community (the headteacher a member of the governing body and two members of senior leadership). I knew straightaway that I hadn’t been successful with the interview because even though the interview allowed 45 minutes to an hour I had finished answering all the questions in 20 minutes. I researched the school website off by heart and I knew all of the schools policies and mission statements however, I didn’t take a lot of time to think about my experiences from my teacher training and how I was going to put that in an answer to them as most of the questions were about me but for some reason I thought the questions were going to be about the school and how I would fit in which 100% wasn’t the case. I got a call back from the headteacher about an hour and a half later and he explained I have been unsuccessful and I could ring back in two weeks after the holidays for some feedback. 

Getting Feedback

I was embarrassed to ring back because I didn’t want to hear my failures over the phone but I know that listening to what he had to say would help me in the future if I was invited to another interview. The headteacher explained that my answers weren’t very detailed and I didn’t give many examples of my own experience and tended to keep the answers very short which didn’t give them a lot of information about my experience as a teacher. For example when explaining the behaviour management technique I use or spoke about a situation within placement I didn’t go into very much detail which is what they were looking for as by doing this it would’ve given them a lot more information about my experience and what I could bring to the school as a teacher. He also gave me some tips for the lesson plan I produced  as the activity for the interview was to plan a lesson; he said that I should listen to the brief and strictly follow the brief because even though my lesson plan was great he wanted the lesson plan to be about reading but I focus my lesson plan more on vocabulary which isn’t what they asked for. 

Stepping forward

When I was called to the next interview (which to bear in mind was about three weeks after my first unsuccessful interview) I was feeling very nervous but as soon as I was introduced to everyone before the interview began I just felt very calm straight away because all three interviewers were really warm and made me feel at ease. I also made sure to explain all my answers in detail and sometimes I gave two examples if I didn’t feel like that was a enough, I didn’t worry that I was speaking to much because at the end of the day this interview is for them to find out about me and my experience as a teacher and what I can being to the school so therefore I needed to talk about myself and my teaching experience as much as possible. In addition, I was asked to plan a maths lesson, I stuck to the brief and did exactly they asked by not going off topic, I also made sure that the values of the school were embedded within the lesson plan and I made it very detailed because I wasn’t actually going to be able to teach that lesson due to Covid so I wanted to make sure that they could see my teaching style clearly within the plan and that they could visualise what my lesson would like if they were to see it in person. 

Lessons learnt

Overall I think it’s really important to listen to constructive feedback, be confident, use examples and listen to the brief but most of all be yourself and try not to come across as being nervous because if you do that shows. It is extremely difficult having an interview over zoom but they are new to this way of working too, so be confident in yourself and your ability.

Here @MrsLFlower talks about a slightly different experience which offers the same challenges and opportunities for growth. Stepping down from Leadership.

I was saturated with mortification. I felt the slow, hot prickle of shame creeping up my chest and neck, settling on my cheeks, emblazoned for the world to see. 

My usual tagline here is ‘I stepped down from leadership after a difficult return from maternity leave’. This quick, rehearsed, flyaway comment with the practiced smile gives just enough of the truth to feel authentic, without exposing the hurt too much.

Knowing that I wasn’t good enough, that I’d made mistakes, that I hadn’t lived up to the lofty ideal of fabulous leader and new mummy, made me ashamed. I believed I’d failed, and that this was the end of everything I was.

Although not an unsuccessful job interview, the above situation brought about the familiar feeling of ‘doors closing.’ 8 months later, I’ve come to the other side feeling stronger, with clarity and vision, and most importantly, with renewed hope.

My tips for coming through the shame and hurt of job interview rejection are:

Grieve: Perhaps you really loved the school, or the opportunities it presented, or, frankly, the status and prestige of the role. Perhaps you really needed this job, financially, or because of its location, or even to get out of your present school. Allow yourself the time to process these feelings – name them, let them out, write them down, cry, wail, curl up in a ball – let it happen. Ignore, for now, the well meaning ‘chin up’ type comments from others. You had hopes for the possibilities of this role – you have a right to be upset. 

Find your supporters: Now turn to those well meaning people. Tell them of your grief. Share your truth. Use them as a mirror – are you really upset about this particular role? Or is it that you now feel definite about applying for a similar role elsewhere? Seek out those above you at your current school, and ask them for advice to develop. Take a deep breath, and ask for meaningful feedback from the school you have just applied to – could someone ring you to really talk it all through? Use this feedback to rebuild your confidence, and strengthen your resolve. 

Search out new opportunities: From your feedback and the opinions of those above you at your current school, what were your strengths? Are these areas you’re passionate about? Shout about these! Attend (virtual) events about them, meet other expert educators, broadcast your ideas, blog, tweet, vlog – you never know where it may lead! Equally, enter into the world of your areas for development, humbly as a novice, reading, absorbing, experiencing all you can. 

Getting back up after a setback is incredibly difficult, and seeing the light that may come afterwards can feel impossible. I broke, falling so far and so hard I couldn’t see for the impetus of shame, dragging me to hide in the shadows. It was after my grieving period, when I found my tribe, that I began to slowly unfurl my tightly held petals to emerge, smiling, into the sun.

I hope the above experiences provide support for the teachers out there who are experiencing some set backs. The common theme seems to be heal and nurture yourself, learn and move forward.

Work Life Balance, Thinking Time and Lessons Learnt from Lockdown

As I sit here waiting for Boris Johnsons announcement on Sunday night I take a moment to reflect on what Lockdown has taught me. I mean it may all be over tomorrow, unlikely but the possibility is there that the PM will spring it on us that we are all due to go back into schools and well, just cope. This isn’t a blog about the announcement, its merits and drawback. This is a blog about what lockdown has taught me as a senior leader.

I’ve noticed that as I’ve worked my way up to VP my life is always divided into three and very rarely do they get an equal share. The three parts are:

Teaching and learning – whether that be me teaching, observing other teachers, having discussions about curriculum or organising and delivering CPD.

Business, behaviour and admin – The school calendar, on call, phone calls, meetings about business issues or logistics

Personal development and Family – My own development and time with family and friends

I’m not proud of it but the last one probably gets the least attention when I’m half way through a term and I think many people will agree.

But this time in lockdown has taught me so many things. I can certainly say it hasn’t been a period of slowing down but certainly given me many more periods of reflection.

These are things I have learnt and hope to take forward when we do return to ‘normal’ whatever that may look like.

Work

I produce better work when I have had time to mull it over. Therefore, I must build time to throw ideas around in my head. During lockdown this has been somewhat easier as I am not being dragged to the next ‘emergency’ which often finds itself not being an ‘emergency.’ I’ve actually blocked out time before a meeting to think about how I feel about the area for discussion or built in time to do something else before I write a paper. And the end result of all of this? I am producing better work. How do I apply this when I get back? A quick walk around the site? Moving myself to an empty classroom to work things out in my head? Locking myself in the loos? I don’t know, but I know I have to build it in.

I love people. I didn’t know I was a hugger until this point but I miss a hug. I love people, they fascinate me, my staff my students. I hate to admit it but I have probably had more face to face time with people than I would at school. I have had in depth, hilarious and fascinating conversations with all of my middle leaders, some of them one and a half hours long as we discuss our dreams for education and the school. When this is over I have vowed to spend more time in the staff room or in departments because that’s where the beating heart of our school is. This may sound obvious but ask anyone one in SLT and they’ll tell you this doesn’t always happen.

I have to get braver at pushing back on deadlines. I have had to do this a lot more as on some days I can have Zoom meetings back to back therefore expecting me to produce something in between them is impossible therefore, I have to block out time for writing and be proactive in deciding when work will be completed and sent. Many of the times I’ve found deadlines can be moved. If you produce good work people will be amenable to waiting 24 hours for it. This became really clear as I was reading Brendan Burchards’ High Performance Habits. In it he encourages people to control their time by really testing if deadlines are deadline.

I need to block my time out first. As people have been booking in meetings online a lot more I have started blocking out things I want to do in my diary on a Sunday. It might be a walk, thinking time or just time to read an article. This means when someone tries to schedule time with me they can see I’m busy and can work around those times. I even block out time for a cup of tea in the garden right now to get away from the screen. In the future this might be blocks of time for a chat with a colleague to get a different perspective or a walk around site.

Home/Personal

I’m a nicer person when I’m not reactive! My husband’s noticed it, my niece has noticed it. When I’m setting my week up and not just producing to meet other people’s deadlines and have built in some down time, I’m a better person! No surprises there. But it’s made me think more about transition times when I change from one activity to another. When I drive home do I take that time to wind down or make work calls? The former would be better. When I go into a meeting do I carry the thoughts and stress of the previous activity or take a few minutes to think positively about the meeting I’m going into? This might sound a bit woo woo but I think entering situations with a fresher mind can only be a good thing right?

I can use the phone well. I hate using the phone. I don’t have long conversations with friends and I’d rather just meet face to face. But the lockdown has forced me to use the phone well. Face time quizzes and chats have become the new norm and are great. I’m going to prefer face to face chats when I can have them but face time won’t be such a bad alternative if not.

Obligations. I’ve spoken to a lot of people and they have highlighted this one. How much of the stuff do we do out of obligation and because we don’t want to say no. Whether it’s fear of missing out or looking like a bad person it’s easy for things to creep into our diary due to this. Be on guard. I’ve certainly listed a few things I’m going to be doing less of.

I think the single most important thing has been thinking space. This period has given me thinking space and I’ve learnt that at work that can’t happen by accident, it has to be built into my week. It may be at the end of each day but I have to give myself some time to be, feel what I’m feeling and process.

So there you have it a few ponderings about work and life and lessons learnt from lockdown. Will I be able to stick with them all when life returns back to it’s chaotic madness in school? Of course not, but at least I’ll know its possible and there is a better way of working and living. So maybe I’ll try a little harder to have a work life balance.

Fail Fast, Learn Fast in 2020

I once heard someone say ‘You can have 5 years of experience in 5 years or 1 year of experience in 5 years it’s up to you,’ and that just stuck with me and got under my skin.

I was just starting out in teaching, shifting from a different career and I thought about my previous career and really asked myself how many years I had wasted doing the same thing over and over or going through the motions. I would guess at least 40% of my actions were a repeat, rehashing the same things and not trying new things with risk. At the same time I was beginning my career in teaching and realised that Leadership teams in any school I worked for were desperate for enthusiastic teachers to have ideas and run with them on the condition that they would be self-evaluative, critical and share their thoughts. So I had a prime opportunity not to repeat my past.

How we should educate has always been an area for debate even amongst non professionals, take some of our political leaders for example who have never set foot in a classroom but claim to know what is best. However, we are seeing a flurry of new material and research in the field. The only way to know what is and isn’t worth pursuing is to discuss it in education spheres and then try it.

This has been a thoroughly enjoyable blog to write. Casting my mind back to things that I have tried but have not worked has made me laugh, cringe and eventually feel proud at the things I have tried and tested. Here are some examples of things I have tried and may have failed depending on what we are looking at for an outcome:

NQT year, I took the hardest to reach group of girls in Year 9 with no aspirations other than to marry drug dealers (their words not mine) and did 11 1 hour sessions with them on careers. To be honest this was a pretty easy sell to the principal who just desperately wanted someone to keep an eye on them and wanted them out the corridors so he literally said ‘How much?’ I’d seen an online package for £250 and we went through it. The package failed, was clunky, boring and is no longer in circulation but I had some great conversations with the girls about their dreams. I showed them online listings of the average earnings of numerous jobs and they hadn’t heard of 98% of them. So we would discuss what different jobs did. We calculated the costs of wanting to live the lives they dreamed of. Did it change their GCSE grades, nope. Did it teach them better maths or English or science. Nope. Did it make them feel like someone at school was listening to them and invested in their future. I think so, yes. Failure or success? You decide.

Do you remember the craze with ipads in classrooms? I heard about schools giving ipads to every student in Year 7 to enhance learning. My Principal at the time was considering it. I started an initiative to train a small group of teachers to try incorporating technology into the classroom more regularly. It was a mess. To be honest in my heart of hearts I thoughts I pads could add some value but I’ve always believed in traditional teaching methods and direct instruction over snazzy apps. Failure? Absolutely and thank god for it. I’m so glad that fad is over.

On to my next IT failure…..I love screencasting (basically filming your screen whilst you talk  over it and have used it to give feedback to students on their essays.) I tried to get my dept to take it on and soon realised not everyone feels that way. To be honest it only worked with my A level classes and even then only one class. I don’t know why I got so attached to it, perhaps because the idea was more effective in my head than in real life. Luckily, my dept staff telling me to stick that laptop where the sun don’t shine soon brought me back to my senses.

My first Inset to organise for the Trust. Imagine over 400 teachers. I can honestly say this is more daunting then standing in front of 400 students. Teachers are a hard bunch to please. I booked a speaker who is really popular online. Really popular. I’m not going to tell you who but you will have heard of him. I also booked another in the morning who was not even on twitter but who’s work I read and thought was brilliant. Due to the second in my mind being an unknown entity I vetted him on the phone a lot more. The blog guru I didn’t. On inset day, my unknown speaker was an absolute triumph and the well known blogger killed us with boredom. Now I vet them all equally and politely cancel anyone I don’t get a good sense from. It’s not worth the humiliation, trust me.

My very first observation as a department head was a complete failure. I was desperate to show I was a good dept head. It was the first post I had in that position. I was struggling with a few of my classes but didn’t want to show it. My first observation was with THAT class. It was terrible. When I say terrible I mean my students actually heckled the observer. I could feel beads of sweat down my back. My cheeks were so red with embarrassment I felt like I’d been slapped. In fact that seemed like a better outcome than the observation outcome I was about to get. Long story short. It was awful. I cried all the way through the feedback. I’m talking snot bubbles cried. The amazing AP helped me with the 3 students who made it impossible for others to learn in the classroom. She supported me with the parents. I have never taken behaviour like that in the classroom since. And I have never been able to thank her enough for showing me what kind leadership looks like. Failure? On the day yes. In hindsight no. And it didn’t kill me in fact the same AP encouraged me to apply for a leadership post when it came up and I got it.

I’m sure I have introduced lots of stupid ideas in my time of leading teaching and learning and made more fumbles then I care to remember. But the great thing is whilst writing this there are many I don’t remember. Maybe that is why I don’t mind failing fast. Maybe I’m going senile. Or maybe, just maybe they weren’t that big of a deal in the first place although they felt that way in the moment. I think we spend too much time promoting our successes and are too nervous talking about things that don’t work. There is real gold in that too. So my hope for you in 2020 is that you work through lots of things that aren’t working so you can double down on the stuff that does. Be brave.